~Thursday, September 20, 2007

Well...

I could feel the corner of my mouth tighten into a smile, but I did my best to stop it. It's really not that big of a surprise for me. I don't write about it and I don't talk about it, but Scott often speaks of the future. Our future.

"Do you think you could handle being with me for the rest of your life?" he often randomly asks me.

"Maaaaaaaybe," I answer coyly.

The truth is I've never responded in the affirmative. When he demands that I stop kidding around and answer him seriously, I always say it's too early for me to know, but I'm willing to take the time to find out. I've never said, "Yes, it's going to be just you and me."

Ever since my relationship with The Alcoholic, I've refrained from discussing the future with anybody. I've found out it hurts more when you plan for it and it doesn't happen. It seems easier to not expect it and then be delighted when it comes... I can only imagine because it's never come. Thus proving that it's better to not talk about it.

So the question: would I say yes? I don't know. I'd like for him to figure out what he's going to do career-wise and get his bills under control first. I'd like for us to go on vacation together first--I believe how a couple acts on vacation (fighting or not) is a indicator of if things will work out. I'd like to settle Issue I Don't Want To Talk About first.

I'd like to do a lot of things first actually.

7 comments:

dont eat the token said...

Excellent thinking. But I hope that he doesn't get frazzled with you being level-headed and him a bit compulsive. And I hope you don't get frazzled trying to keep him cool.

My vacas with Jukebox are usually pretty awesome. Then we get home and I'm a stress ball again.

:) for you

Me said...

My experience is both ways when it comes to vacations.

The honeymoon was the marriage in a nutshell. Ugly scenes in private, happy faces on show in public.

Family vacations, however, once the kids were born and old enough to come along, were the one time when I was "in charge" and all was pretty happy. I never knew why that was the one time when she'd allow for the possibility that I might not be an idiot, but it was a good thing.

M-Joy said...

SMART GIRL!! C is actually my best travel companion, my best guy friend and the worst boyfriend material.

I'm very glad to know your feet are firmly planted on the ground and you must go through some major holiday family events first I think before you can really tell also.

Thanksgiving is coming up...are you going to spend it together?

Bexxie said...

It's good to hear you want to do alot of different things together first.

You guys have plenty of time for marriage and the rest .. just enjoy it and relax (that's more for him not you) :o)

Drama Queen said...

Agreed. I think you need a lot of firsts, seconds, even thirds before you embrace forever.

A Life Uncommon said...

Forever is so long. I am all for taking the time, lots of time actually to REALLY figure out whether two people are compatible. I've heard this takes at least 2 years.

Amber said...

I am so proud of you for not letting his enthusiasm push you into skipping over all the "firsts" that are so important.

Take your time and don't feel guilty about it.

If he is "the one" that you're going to spend the rest of your life with, then there's no hurry. And more importantly, there are no more "do overs."

I'm glad to see you enjoying each step and building this into a relationship that is healthy, with open communication.

Kudos to you, chica!

PS: Why have I not been hearing from you lately?! No phone, no email, no nada. I am sad. lol

 

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