~Wednesday, June 25, 2008

In which finding a new job is like finding a new boyfriend

I walked in my coworker's office unannounced, closed the door behind me, and got comfortable in his chair. Dan raised an eyebrow at me and paused his music.

I took a deep breath. "So you know I got a call back for that one application, right? The one I felt least qualified for, but submitted my résumé anyway? Well he called me last night. Actually it was yesterday afternoon. It was 4:40. But I didn't pick up the call because I didn't recognize the number, and I didn't call him back yesterday because it was so close to the end of the day. Anyway, Mike talked me into calling him back at 9 a.m., even though I didn't want to. I thought it was too early and wanted to wait till midmorning. But stupidly I called at 9 a.m. and—of course—he didn't pick up. So I left a message. I wish I didn't leave a message: that way I could keep calling every 20 minutes until he picks up the phone, but now that I left a message I'll look like a crazy stalker. What if he doesn't call me back? When can I call again without looking desperate?" I resumed breathing again.

Dan by this point had raised his other eyebrow and dropped his mouth open a little. "First of all, Sarah, calm down. It's not like looking for a job is like--"

"Finding a date? It exactly is! I have to be breezy. I have to pretend I don't need this job. I am perfectly happy and content staying at my current job. When in reality, I want this job. I want a new job so much that I'm now sitting in your office with the door closed analyzing phone messages. I actually brought my phone in here and played the message for you! What do you think girls do, Dan?"

"I would keep calling until he picks up."

I stood up and leaned over his desk, "And that's why you're single, Dan," I hollered. "You have no game!" And with that, I stomped out of his office.

Instead, I chose to play the dating game. So I did what any girl would do. I called my friend who actually works at the company and had him check the company schedule to see at what time my contact would be free and at his desk, readily available to answer my phone call. And then I called 15 minutes after that.


This morning I got up and cheated on my employers. I dialed work when I knew no one would be in yet, prepared to leave a cryptic message about my whereabouts. I didn't want to lie, but if I sounded sick and they just happened to think I was sick, that's no fault of mine.

I pulled out nicer clothes than I normally wear to my job. Then I put on a full face of makeup— something my job hasn't seen since my first month there. And then I drove to another job.

The interview went well. The interview went really, really well. I Googled the company before the date and read up on background information. I asked insightful questions and laughed at the appropriate times. And when it came to expectations, I held my cards.

He said he'd let me know by the end of the week. Waiting three days to call, I thought, how so very like him.


Lpeg said...

Oh my goodness!!! Goodluck, goodluck!!!

Oh how I want a new job so badly!!

Anonymous said...

Ooooooooooh I'm all excited for you

tenderhooligan said...

I'd never thought about the dating/ job-seeking similarities before but you're absolutely right!

And good luck!

kristin b said...

haha! that is SO true about interviewing & dating!!

good LUCK!

Tilly said...

I couldn't agree more about the dating/job search. They are THE SAME. Also, GOOD LUCK!! Get me one while you're at it, how 'bout!

NicoleC said...

That comparison couldn't be more accurate! Perfect!
I'll be keeping good thoughts for you!!

Paige Jennifer said...

Oh how I detest the waiting game. Whether for a boy to admit affection or for Chick-Fil-A to call my order, I suffer from an absence of patience.

Good luck with everything!!!

Richard Jennings said...

there are still many high paying jobs posted on employment sites i.e.


There still seems to be a strong demand for professional talent.

J said...

Oh! This is exciting. I have my fingers crossed this works out!

Amber said...

Sarah! That was such an awesome post! I LOVED it!!!

Good luck on getting the new job, hon. I'm so proud of you for taking some chances!

And yelling that at your poor co-worker was totally classic! :)

Peach said...

...although of course when they call and offer you the job you can't say "cool yeah, maybe" ha ha, (or can you?)


HomeImprovementNinja said...

Hey! When it's time to negotiate Salary, check out a book called "$1000 a minute". It's great. I would send you my copy, but I loaned it out one too many times and it never came back.

Anonymous said...

Yep, first dates are like interviews, and the waiting game in both job searching and dating can be excruciating. I hope you found your perfect match!!

AmyD said...

Ooooh, GOOD LUCK!! It sounds like it went really well, so unless Wonder Woman is applying for the job, why wouldn't you get it?? ;o)

Keep us posted...and thanks for this hilarious post. We ladies ARE pretty silly about such things, aren't we?

Trixie said...

Oh lets hope this goes like dating clockwork and he calls you on day 3!

Miss Nat said...

I've always said to apply the same p principles in finding a mate as you would a job. It just makes sense.

Di Pie said...

first time here and i LOVE your writing!!!


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