~Tuesday, February 01, 2011

Bits and Pieces

Phone conversation with Harvey approximately 10 minutes after breakup:

"You know what my worst problem is?" I sniffed. "I just spent $7.99 on a box of magnum condoms. What the fuck am I going to do with a box of magnum condoms? It's not like I can save those for the next guy."

Harvey laughed. Deep belly-aching laughed. "If that's your worst problem, then you are going to be just fine. BTW, I love you for saying that."


Phone conversation with Mike, a married confidant and co-worker of mine from two completely separate companies, regarding the breakup:

He sighed, "Fine, Sarah. I'll date you. I will get a permission slip from my wife and date you. If polygamy ever becomes legal, I am taking you on as my first second wife, so you better get ready."

It seems easy for the committed guys to see that I'm a healthy, dateable girl. How is this getting lost in translation to single guys?


On the first day last week where I felt normal again:

I handed my boss a report I'd been working on. She studied me. "Are you okay?" she asked. "Because you look awful."

Gah.

12 comments:

J said...

It seems easy for the committed guys to see that I'm a healthy, dateable girl. How is this getting lost in translation to single guys?

I ask this same question all the time. My best male friends tell me I am a great catch and blah blah blah. Its great to hear but for once I would like that to come from a single available man!

Seine said...

hahaha i had the same thought when HB left ... what the hell am i going to do with all these magnum condoms? they're still in my drawer. maybe one day, he'll come back to boston, and we'll have a good time.

cornflakegirl74 said...

GAH is right... I think about that all the time. I'm normal! I'm fun! My married male friends (or the ones in serious relationships) always say the same... so why are all the other boys so blind?

Is it sad that I'm jealous you had use out of a box of magnum condoms recently?? ;) Good for you, girly!

Je m'appelle Danielle said...

Magnum condoms, Jesus-tapdancing Christ, you have every right to be sad. I am sad for you right now. I cried all day when Mr Big and I broke things off, I still get a little down about it... Anyway...

Committed guys see that girls like you (or myself) are dateable because they knew what they were looking for. Those guys were done playing games and they were ready to settle down. They reached that point.

Besides they probably see the same qualities in you that their wives have, albeit not in the exact same way, but those base things.

La Femme said...

-__-

Anonymous said...

You have some funny friends. I love the "second wife" offer. I would be in to it. Wow, someone else to help with the house work. :) I am glad you are going better.

Anonymous said...

doing better rather.

Hope said...

I did the same thing. Condom shopping then bam! It's over.

Is it possible that the Condom gods have it in for us?

But seriously, I was thinking about you yesterday. How are you doing?

nuttycow said...

You, J and I all have the same issues then. Why is it that bloody taken men (or men who are asexual because they're your best friends) can see that we're awesome and yet hot, single men with nice arms, can't?

Fingers crossed for us all, eh?

Lpeg said...

Hope: What? Condom shopping then, Bam? Fuck. I was about to do that, maybe I won't now....

Sarah: Sorry, love. I do think your conversation was hilarious though :) And you're right - it's not like you can use those for the next guy! I'd be sad too!

Angela said...

The guys aren't as healthy and dateable as they might originally seem.

Me said...

It's a shame about the magnum's. But here's to hope! ;)

 

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