~Monday, May 02, 2011

Rumor Has It

The next morning I showed up to work late, blood shot and bleary eyed. I forgot my security pass so I had to ring the bell in front of the large, heavy mahogany doors. I struck a pose, arm akimbo and a tired smile, for the girl answering the door.

"You look like shit," my coworker said when she saw me.

I felt like shit and I smelled like an ashtray. It was the single most unprofessional moment in my life. I sat down at my desk and opened my purse, only to discover last night's clothes stowed away. I shoved them in my desk before anyone could see. As one of the remaining single girls in the office, this kind of behavior is always expected of me, but I've never taken anyone up on it until now. I knew I would be fine as long as I got my work done and didn't make this a frequent habit. As Harvey always says, "If you're going to be a man at night, be a man in the morning."

I sat very quietly at my desk before I opened up my e-mail. Waiting for me was an invitation from the Tattooed Boy. Margaritas, it read, After work.

Sweet Jesus, I can't think of anything I would like less at the moment. I wasn't the only person on the e-mail invitation; I also noticed First Baseman's name as well as Girl from Irish Pub. That's the rough part about making new friends: when you are first invited to things, you always have to accept until you are sure you have received the standing invite. It's a lot of work.

I looked in the corner of my screen and saw Statham's green light by his IM status. I haven't spoken to him at all that week. The drama of almost being caught had scared him off. I clicked on his name and started typing.

By the way, you were right.

About what?

The rumors were about Clemson and not you.

When the Leader was sitting next to me last night, I followed Statham's instructions. "Hey, you said that you heard I hooked up last week. I didn't do anything with Clemson," I said. That way I could find out to whom he was referring without incriminating Statham.

"Oh... haha... I didn't mean sexually," the Leader back pedalled.

Later that night when I was in Clemson's bed, I asked him why he told everyone I spent the night.

"Who did you hear that from?" he asked.

"Leader, Girl from Irish Pub," I swallowed. "Statham."

"I didn't say anything to the Leader," he replied. "I told Girl from Irish Pub because I was asking her advice, and I told Statham."

Statham never told me he heard it directly from Clemson. And from what I infer from the way they talk about each other, they aren't friends.

Clemson paused. "When I told Statham, he was really inquisitive. He told me y'all went out to dinner. He said you have the best taste in the city."

My eyes fluttered open from resting on Clemson's shoulder. I was shocked. Statham, the boy who didn't wish me a happy birthday and has been out of contact for most of the week, was curious about my whereabouts. He had liked me. At least at one point in time he did.

The IM I received from him this morning, however, did not allude to the same feelings.

Thanks for clearing that up, it read. I closed the window and moved on to my morning.

That afternoon, I got an angry e-mail from him: I mean, yes, I am very upset about the whole "rumor" thing... it caused such a ripple effect of drama... but, you apologized... and since people weren't actually sitting around at a bar spreading lies about me, I guess I shouldn't be upset.

I raised an eyebrow. First of all, the "lies" are true. Secondly, I brought something that I thought was relevant to him; he's the one who panicked and called several people telling them about the rumor, including his ex-girlfriend. He should have let it go until I got confirmation from the Leader. I tried to warn him: Statham doth protest too much, implying his own guilt.


After work, I headed to happy hour hosted on the roof of a building and met up with the Tattooed Boy. Girl from Irish Pub was already seated.

"Y'all I do not feel well," I said as I slumped in a chair.

"You're telling me," she laughed. "I got so drunk last night that I was throwing up until 5 a.m."

I immediately felt better. Funny thing is, we were not out together. She was at another bar with First Baseman re-enacting my night. She even arrived at work at the same time I did.

Another couple arrived, then First Baseman and then the Tattooed Boy. The six of us shared stories of our respective nights out and laughed.

Then Statham teetered in.

He took a seat one chair over from me. He then didn't make eye contact with me for the first 20 minutes he was there. He leaned in to Girl from Irish Pub and whispered something. She whispered something back. I knew he was talking about me; I recognized this behavior from when he did it to me about his ex-girlfriend.

Statham was so worried about being caught with me that he was now denying my very existence at a table for seven. Un-fucking-believable. Who's the bitch in this relationship? It isn't me. I interacted with everybody the same as I normally would, including Statham. Only then did he finally warm up to me.

The Tattooed Boy then asked if anyone would like to move to a second location. I accepted while everyone else ducked out. First Baseman slipped a few dollars in my hand and told me to tip the rooftop guitarist. People stood up from the table. I leaned back and whispered to Statham, "Walk me to my car?"

He grimaced and then accepted.

I waited until we left the building and were alone in the parking lot.

"How mad are you?" I asked. "You understand that it was a misunderstanding on my part, right? That's what I want to convey to you," I said.

"Yeah, but the damage is done," he said. "It's like the accusation of rape: it's harder to clear your name with a rumor like that."

"I took it to you. It was your choice to run with it and tell everyone else about it," I said.

"To be honest, I don't know you well enough to trust you, so I called the people that I've known for years and do trust."

I looked to the ground. It was dark out and the parking lot was near-abandoned. I could hear Queen's "Fat Bottomed Girls" echo from the guitarist back on the rooftop patio. I told Statham that his over-compensation in respects to his non-interaction with me had hurt my feelings. I said that I knew he was trying to protect his ex-girlfriend, but to just remember that I am a person too. It's not fair to treat me like shit because I accepted his advances.

He agreed and apologized, but I knew it wouldn't change anything. "It's just that because of the almost-rumor, I am so afraid of doing anything else; it hasn't even been a month yet. I've been laying low and letting everything die down." He said he respected me for telling him how I felt instead of letting it fester.

"I didn't know you were going to be here tonight," he said.

"Yeah, I figured that."

"I heard you came with the Tattooed Boy."

I tilted my head back and laughed. So that's what Girl from Irish Pub whispered to Statham. "Ridiculous." It was probably the only rumor I've enjoyed so far; let Statham think that I'm highly sought after.

"I don't regret what I did with you, but know that I don't normally do this. You're the only person I hooked up with from the league."

It was just rhetoric to me. Statham says the right things, but his actions of ignoring me were still in the forefront of my mind. Because he's shorter than me, usually I stoop or lean on something when I'm with him. I felt myself arch my back and tower over him.

"You're the only person I've hooked up with as well, despite what you may hear about Clemson, or the Tattooed Boy," I paused, "Or whomever you hear about next week," I added for good measure.

"That's right, the Tattooed Boy is waiting for you," he said. "And Clemson-" Statham cut himself off. "I can't do this. I got to go." And he turned on his heels and walked away.


Je m'appelle Danielle said...

Ugh what a fucking vagina! I wouldn't even bother talking to him anymore.

J said...

Wow, he's being such a tool and a drama queen. He needs to get over himself.

Red Stethoscope said...

I'm with J! Drama, lately? I'm new to the storyline, so this may be reading in to it too much, but Statham also sounds extremely insecure.

j said...

Bah! I just want to shake him.

Angela said...

So, he's making you feel like shit over something that wasn't your fault - and was the truth - but can't handle the fact that Clemson and Tattooed are both closing in? ugh.

Anonymous said...

Remind me why you WANT to be friends with this group of people again? Ugh.

Toddy said...

Wow, I really need to catch up on your blog. I didnt understand one single word of this. What you been up to crazy girl? Thanks for the support and thoughtful comments on my blog. Solidarity is making this breakup suck slightly less. Cheers, T.

La Femme said...

He's like a tool from a reality TV Show.

Northern lass said...

I'm with anonymous. This group act like they are in high school.

Is it really worth the drama?

Anonymous said...

Oh Sarah, what are you doing with these people? They are so beneath you. I can't understand why you don't just shrug the lot of them off - the gossip and sniping and antics are just so immature. I have been reading it all and wondering how on earth any of them have time to work or sleep or do their food shop simply because they're all so busy spreading rumours and bed hopping.

I know your sport means a lot to you and so the social aspect is important, but I'd leave it as socialising around the games and not embroil myself with this lot for any other socialising at all.

Just you take care.

jo said...

this group sounds like way too much drama, rumors and gossiping. and frankly just sounds batshit crazy. maybe it's 'coz of that that statham acted like such a jerk, not that it excuses anything. but good on you for telling it to him straight. at least you got that off your chest.

Syd said...

So, look. I dig my booze, love nights out and stuff like that. So, I'm not coming from a anti-drinking stance when I say this: I think you need to lay off the big nights out with this group for a little while. I sort of see drinking with new groups of friends as drinking with people at a new job - I don't like to give them any fuel for gossiping (well, at least for a little while or until I have dirt on them). They seem SO gossipy (and they may be nice, just going by what you've been writing), that the drama of having to worry about your reputation with them under the best of circumstances only seems to become more complicated when the booze is involved.

This is totally not concern trolling, its more like..get buzzed with new friends, but only get trashed with the ones that you trust.

treacle said...

Sarah. Just take care of you in all this.

Anonymous said...

I can't see his point of view when it comes to how he has convinced himself the truth is a lie but I can see his point of view on not trusting you. You have been a bit of a hurricane swooping in and dancing a flirty whirlwind with three different guys. If it's a relationship you are looking for it's gotten way to complicated for that, now Clemson and Statham are in a pissing match and Tattoo Boy just wants to get laid before he goes. If it's attention you want...you're getting what you want but it doesn't seem to be making you very happy

Dream in Grey said...

I reiterate my previous - Tossbiscuit.

freckledk said...

Can't top the Vagina comment, which sums this up quite nicely.

Anonymous said...

oi! *head smack* who are these people.

when i turned 30 i had stupid people around me to and i asked myself why am i friends with them. as i turn 32, i'm no longer friends with them.

Bathwater said...

One of the Anonymous people has a point you certainly are getting the attention.

Statham is a total disappointment. This bs about denying the truth, there is no reason for that. If he was so afraid of hurting his ex then he should not have slept with you.

You have been way to nice to him at this point.

Maura said...

From this point on, it's going to be difficult for me to read any quotes from this tool of a boy and not hear Kristen Bell mimicking Russell Brand, saying, "Bullshit Bullshit Bullshit." If you haven't seen Forgetting Sarah Marshall, get on it.

What a douche.

Anonymous said...

ugh... just venting here, but the word rape needs to be discarded as a breezy reference, just like the name hitler. ppl use it with such ignorance!


Anonymous said...

LOL Maura and the "bullshit bullshit bullshit" line. I LOVE IT!



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