~Tuesday, June 12, 2012

The Mothers, Part I

Flashback to Abraham's cruise with his parents:

Mother: So who is picking you up from the airport?
Abe: My girlfriend.
Mother: Haha, that's a good one.

She thought he was joking. Abraham had never talked about his love life with his parents ever, so it seemed natural that he was just making a funny.

He decided to have fun with his mother's disbelief, referring to me as Al the entire cruise. He stopped at a booth that sends short video postcards to people back home. "Hold on, I'm going to send a video to Al," he told them. Or "It's Al's birthday today."

At the last dinner on the last night, he revealed to his parents that Al was indeed his real, live girlfriend. As their faces lit up, he limited them to five questions about Al.

Abraham and I had a bet as to when the question "Is she Jewish?" would appear. Abraham won. It wasn't the first question. For the record it was number three:

How old is she?
What does she do?
Is she Jewish?

In short they were elated. They didn't care that I wasn't Jewish; they were happy that he was with someone who made him him happy.

Abraham was nervous throughout the conversation, never having done this before. When he hesitated after they asked my name, they threatened that they were going to drive through the South until they found me. So he gave them my name. And then the mother friend requested me as soon as she got off the boat.

I paused as I saw the invite on my phone. Then I took a screen capture and messaged it to Abraham.

Abraham was livid. Apparently he had already spoken to his mother about inappropriate friendships on Facebook. The rule is she has to have met one of his friends in person to send a request. We clearly have never met.

He told me to ignore it. I called my own mother for advice, and she warned me to not accept it. Instead I ignored both of them.

I did a cursory glance through all my photos to be sure they were mother appropriate, and then I accepted. For good measure I also sent her a short message saying it was nice to finally meet her and that Abraham spoke well of his family.

Abraham begged me to unfriend her.

"I don't know a lot about being Jewish," I retorted. "But I know one thing."

"Don't piss off the mother," we both said in unison.

Instead he went to work on his mother, eventually getting her to acquiesce and unfriend me a few days later.

However, whenever they call they always tell Abraham, "Say hello to Al for us."


Je m'appelle Danielle said...

"Apparently he had already spoken to his mother about inappropriate friendships on Facebook."

That is awesome. If it were the days pre Facebook, you know she would be trying to go 7 Degrees of Kevin Bacon on your ass. Calling everyones mother that Abraham knows in the south to see if they know what you are about.

Mothers like her are the ultimate stalker, mostly because they are not going to try and sneak around, they almost want you to know that they are collecting info on you!

Anonymous said...

Mazel Tov!

Red Stethoscope said...

Oh my goodness, I can't believe the mother friended you! Well played.

Anonymous said...

I think you did the right thing in accepting the request. well played!

Anonymous said...

I think ya did the right thing. That was the nicest possible thing you could have done and why start out on the wrong foot? PS: This guy loves you. Just sayin... :)

Dawn said...

I don't want to have to be careful about what I write on Facebook.

That's why the following people, who have sent me friend requests, were perfunctorily ignored:

1. My mother-in-law
2. My father-in-law
3. My father
4. My mother-in-law's best friend

It's my version of Facebook security.

Brittany said...

I would've accepted her too, and my mom is just as inappropriate about friendships and facebook as his mom. Actually, way more inappropriate. Mothers.

Anonymous said...

My mother is entirely innappropriate on facebook. she uses it to tell me off. I'm 33. It's more than my lifes worth to block her though.

But yes, you totally did the right thing, as did she, by de-friending. I hope you get to meet her soon :)


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