~Monday, February 02, 2009


I've become somewhat of a light sleeper. Scott's nightly work schedule has him up and wandering the apartment at all hours of the night. Lately I'll wake up to sounds of the TV, frying bacon, or the small wind chime tied to the front door that the dog rings when she wants to go out. I usually identify the noise, holler at Scott to keep it down, roll over, and go back to sleep.

Last night I woke up to Scott getting out of bed at some early hour in the morning. He walked in the closet, flipped the light on and looked confused. I figured he was looking for the bathroom but went in the wrong door, as he often does when he gets up from deep sleep. He then walked out of the closet and back into the bedroom where he stared at the bedroom floor for a moment, and then he brushed back the curtain to leave the bedroom.

Ah, he found the bathroom, I thought.

Then I heard the wind chime tied to the front door jingle as he unlocked both locks and left the apartment.

Did I mention he was stark naked when all this happened?

I realized he was sleep walking, something he hasn't done for about six months- long enough for me to forget about his habit. Remembering all the traumatic times when I woke him up in the middle of it, I counted the seconds and debated how long I should wait before I retrieve my nude boyfriend from wandering around the apartment building and possibly getting arrested. Just when my nervousness peaked, the bell chimed as he came back in, locked both locks, came back into the bedroom and brushed the closet light off before collapsing back into bed.

"Um, baby?"

"Mmm garble."

"You awake?"


He was in deep enough sleep that my suspicion has been confirmed. I got up and went outside into the building hallway to spy any evidence of what Scott was doing outside, but found none. I can't wait till I get home from work today to tell him what he did last night, but whatever he did will remain a mystery.


Blue soup said...

Aww! Poor Scott :D

Cat said...

Oh boy!

LizSara said...

Next time get a camera ;)

kristinblakely said...

that. is. hilarious.

Diane Mandy said...

Can't wait to hear his reaction!

SuvvyGirl said...

LOL At least I'm not the only one who sleep walks naked. I used to sleep walk a lot, especially when I was a teenager. I also had a bad habit of lighting candles too. I think it's probably a good thing I never lived alone. :P

dont eat the token said...

yikes! I'm glad he didn't go outside. People are getting frostbite and dying up here from doing that.

Colleen said...

That is awesome. Reminds me of "Fat Naked Guy" from Friends. Not that I'm saying he's fat. I don't know either of you. :)

MamaBear said...

He's not fat, at all. It is a very good thing though that he didn't get arrested. That would be a difficult one to explain to the judge...


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