~Thursday, April 07, 2011

Flirting with Disaster

The hardest part about not dating is not looking. Not walking into a room and scanning it for the guy who's single and entertaining himself. Not stealing glimpses of him while a friend regales a story to you over a pitcher of beer and a plate of nachos. Not noticing that even though he's sitting catty corner two chairs down from you, he's listening to your conversation and laughs at your funny parts.

Dating You instinctively takes over. You lean back in your chair both casually and confidently. You smile a little brighter, laugh a little harder. Most days you feel like a 6, but tonight, girl, you are a solid 7. You turn on your charm and incorporate him into the conversation using your standard bag of tricks: you request the "male perspective" to settle a debate. Of course it works; it always does. You've drawn in the single guy. He's a smart one because he sided with you to settle the argument.

He's noticed you. He remembers seeing you before. Life as a 7 feels grand. You can feel his eyes on you from the other end of the bar as other boys take a turn enjoying time spent talking with you. The leader grabs you to dance. You smile the bright smile and tilt your head back and let loose your trademark laugh. Yes, he's still watching although he's pretending not to.

Another guy you'd been previously working on before you gave up dating sidles up next to you. You're surprised with the ease in which he touches you. His hand is on your side. During your flip cup game, he rubs his hand up and down your back which totally blows your concentration, but feels exhilarating nonetheless. The initial guy works his way back from the bar to the periphery of the crowd surrounding you. He's like a lion, trying to stake a claim in the territory.

And he does it. He asks for your number. You give him your real number before you realize that you are not supposed to be doing this. You, girl, are not supposed to be flirting. You told the world you weren't going to date in the meantime. But you still leave the bar heady. You put yourself to bed, slipping in between the crisp clean sheets and scissor your legs in delight.

And then you find yourself out with the same crowd five nights later. You find yourself enjoying another pitcher of beer and another plate of nachos while you regale another story. This time there's a guy standing with your company, but his eyes are clearly on you. And he laughs at your funny parts, so you know that this one is smart too. Dating You instinctively takes over as you lean back in your chair both casually and confidently and you smile a little brighter and laugh a little harder...

11 comments:

MissM said...

Lol, this so sounds familiar. All the things I am absolutely not doing, while actually doing them.

Lpeg said...

You are such a great writer! And boys! Of course they are drawn to you ;)

Je m'appelle Danielle said...

I hope this is hypothetical, cause you seem a lot higher than a 7, based on your writing alone.

D said...

I love the scissor kick part. I def know that feeling!

J said...

Dude, you are a 10!

Love this post. They are always interested in you when you are not dating, funny how it works that way.

Bathwater said...

I agree you are definitely low balling yourself! Be modest and say 9.

Soph said...

Very good ha ha! I have been there many times too, all too familiar for me!

The things we do in the world of dating...

laniebelluz said...

Yeah, 9 girlfrien'! Enjoy!

jo said...

haha! it's murphy's law... the minute you decide to stop dating, all the single boys come out and show interest. brilliant. and after hearing this story, i'm pretty sure you're higher than a 7... don't sell yourself short hun :P

Seine said...

pretty much impossible not to engage in that. it's the lurking flirter in all of us, especially when under the influence of liquid fun

Charlotte said...

I have to say... as much as I hate dating, I really LOVE being single. And it's because of these kind of emotions, these moments when we feel sexy and confident and right with the world. It's a wonderful feeling to be so comfortable that we can laugh and enjoy and be in the company of beautiful friends and some fascinating strangers...

I am thrilled for you. Keep living the life and enjoy every moment :)

PS: I think you sound more like a 10. You have that sexy confidence that men are always attracted to.

 

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