~Friday, September 09, 2011

Mexico by the Numbers

The number of:

  • Men in Speedos spied: 1
  • Butt cracks seen: 1
  • Obvious cases of malignant melanoma: 1
  • Men in the swimming pool with an obvious toupee: 1
  • Times I heard the theme song to Titanic WHILE ON A BOAT: 3
  • Times I thought this was incredibly inappropriate: 100%
  • Flasks of liquor smuggled into international waters: 25
  • Times I fell down the stairs while holding a drink: 3
  • Times I fell down the stairs while holding a drink stone sober: 1
  • Times I fell down the stairs and spilled my drink on the exact stair the custodian was currently cleaning: 1
  • Times I opened my mouth to speak Spanish and Italian came out instead: 97%
  • Crew members who fit into my cabin: 3
  • People in my party who were at one point escorted by security: 2
  • People in my party who were found naked in the crew section of the cruise ship: 1
  • People I slept with: 1
Stories to come.


Bathwater said...

Sounds mostly harmless, but a bit painful. Should cruise ships install more elevators?

Sarah said...

There were plenty of elevators. I just didn't take them. ;)

j said...

I cannot wait to hear about all of the shenanigans!

Emma said...

Now this sounds interesting...

Lilly said...

Really? Playing the theme from Titanic while on a boat? "Here's your sign." lol

Lpeg said...

ahaha. that explains something :)

Denise said...

So I'm assuming that the 1 person in your party who was naked in the crew section and the 1 person you slept with = you & a crew member :)

Sounds like a fun vaca!

Anonymous said...

whoot! cannot wait to read alllll about it :)

cd0103 said...

How fun! Cannot wait to read about it!

Gretta James said...

Who did you sleep with? and why did you have 3 crew members in your cabin. Geez girl!

Paige Jennifer said...

I love me a good story told with well crafted prose but dang, girl, this quick list had me doubled over in a fit of laughter.


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