Language Barrier

Friday night was spent with The Hungarian, Saturday night was spent at Government Mule's birthday party and Sunday night was spent on Date #6.

The Hungarian. Still unsure of the situation, but I think that's okay for now. He'll say one thing and in my head, I'm thinking, Nope. Not going to happen. And then he'll say something else within five mintues, to which I think, Well, maybe... There's a whole lot of gray going on with him. He's not completely bad and he's not completely good, and it's making things difficult for me to analyze.

I do think I was wrong when I wrote of him so harshly after the first time I met him. He is not, in fact, the type of guy who insults girls to get them into bed. He has never actually done this. Despite the teasing I got when I first met him, he has never done it again. The Hungarian is not the personality that went on that first awkward date.

My struggle with him is that he is so literal. This is not the American way. The American way is to act cool and aloof and humble and then expect the unspoken. For instance, my father tells me every year to not get him a Christmas gift/Father's Day gift/birthday gift. "I don't need anything. I just want a card," he assures. So one year, I showed up with a card and then was in trouble with him for the entire following year because I didn't get him a present because he told me not to. Do you know the number one lie women tell? It's "I'm fine." The American way is to say one thing, mean another, and—most importantly—know the difference.

But The Hungarian says what he means and means what he says and it's led to crossed wires because I'm living subtextually. He reminds me of a close male friend of mine from college whom I affectionately called The German. Until one night when we got drunk and started calling him Ze German.

Ze German was a nice guy and had a kind heart, but he was strange with his social relationships. He refused to pay for any of his dates at any time in the relationship. Ze German said that dating is about the company and he wasn't going to pay for it because then it's too close to prostitution, etc. If he and a woman mutually wanted to spend time together, they could pay their own ways. He had all these little rules like that.

He was also very literal. When he and Conor lived together, Conor accused Ze German of not picking up after himself. To prove that he did indeed pick up after himself, Ze German then went on a two-week rampage where he left every cereal bowl and every glass he used out. It turned into quite a mess and an epic stalemate. That kind of literal.

I guess there is solace in knowing someone is always going to be honest and upfront with you. I guess I'm just not quite used to that idea yet. My whole blog is built around analyzing the subtext.

***

Friday night The Hungarian was telling me about his day and how he just finished this "Avis" book and thought it was really good. Throughout the whole night, it was "Avis" this and "Avis" that. I just smiled and nodded, having no clue what he was talking about.

Until he picked up the book to read to me and I saw a picture of Elvis on the cover.