~Thursday, January 25, 2007

Subtext

I have sort of a big deal going on tomorrow night. I've nominated myself the cruise director and I've spent the better part of a week e-mailing and calling everyone to invite them to said Big Deal. While driving home yesterday, I called those who had not yet responded to e-mails. And I saw his name on my list:

David.

David is a frustrating situation. Thing is, I don't really like David-- not romantically. I don't want to get married and have babies with David. I don't even want to see him every Friday night.

But it's been a few months since I've gotten laid and, dammit, David is my top candidate. I like him enough to sleep with him, and don't like him enough that the situation wouldn't hurt me, no matter the outcome. He's disposable.

I slid my phone shut and kept driving. I don't call boys; it's just not something I do. I'm not comfortable with it because too many times I have dialed and the boy on the other end was in a bad mood and consequently I spend the rest of the evening/weekend/week thinking I did something wrong. It's just not worth the hassle.

Then I thought of the other people I had called: Conor, Mike, Geoff, Bryan... all boys. And I didn't have problems calling them because they're my friends and nothing more. David is a friend and by not calling him I would be treating him differently, and that's not any better.

When I got home I looked at the white board on my fridge for the list of boys' names that I refuse to have in my phone and dialed David. And got no response.

Within the hour I heard back from him. Via e-mail. And because I'm so excellent with subtext, I'm including it in his response:

hey,

sorry i've been unreachable...lot of stuff goin on. (I'm still in love with my ex.) work's been killin me. (We're fighting, which means we're on some sort of speaking terms.) been gettin up at 4:10 am, and getting back well after 6 pm. (I'm not sleeping well because I've been up at night, searching for clues in our fights that she still loves me.) physically exhausted, and i've had to work out too. (I've been leaving emo song lyrics as my away messages on AIM.) so, i might need to just relax and sleep this weekend. (I'm staying home in case she reads my lame-o away message and wants to call me.) hopefully won't have to work this weekend too. (I really want to be home so I'm there when she realizes dumping me was a huge mistake.) but, we'll see. (She's not going to call.) i'll let ya know. (I love her so much.) holla. (E-mail me again and I won't respond.)

d
Too bad David couldn't read my subtext, otherwise he'd be getting some this weekend.

21 comments:

general_boy said...

Maybe "the big deal" will present other opportunities!?

jsull28fl@yaho said...

haaaaa
great take on his mail
maybe you will get lucky on the big deal
good luck
js

SuvvyGirl said...

WEll I'm rooting for you to get laid :P I have noticed one thing with your posts though. You usually refer to guys as boys which I do too until I meet one worth being called a man. I hope someday that you'll find someone worth that title, you deserve it. :)

M said...

ha, I was thinking what gboy was thinking!

Angel Girl said...

lol rootin for ya too.. I know i'm in need of some ummm "opportunities" too. FYI loved the subtexts!

Phil said...

Brilliant, absolutley brillant!

jedimerc said...

Subtext, like the details (though one might say subtext is the details :), is everything... have a great time though, regardless if opportunities present themself or not :)

Amber said...

Sarah, that made me laugh and yet... I'm so feeling your frustration about not getting laid in a few months.

But hey, look on the bright side. At least you have a possible candidate. Even if he is an emo-pussy-whipped-by-his-ex-little-boy. I think most men are little boys - only their penises get bigger.

Good luck and I hope you have a great time on your Big Deal this weekend!! I loved the sub-texting, by the way :).

pinkjellybaby said...

i love what you've done there! that's the kind of sub-texting that i do with EVERYTHING in the WORLD!! :)

Sarah said...

General Boy- I hope so. Otherwise I'm going to be heading out to bars alone soon just to bring a man home with me. Which is not my style. Or safe.

JS- There is a possibility of meeting new people :)

Suvygirl- I've gotten crap for at least 6 years for saying "boy." That'll be the day when I stop saying it!

M- New opportunities would be a nice change of pace right now.

Angel Girl- Oh don't even get me started Miss "I have to choose between 9 and I don't know which one!"

Phil- It's brilliant because it's true. I bet you any amount of money :)

Jedimerc- Ah, you think like me: a realist.

Amber- Eh, I'm going to have to remove his candidacy after that horrible e-mail.

I call it like I see it, and I'm glad you liked it!

Pink Jellybaby- The good (or bad as this case may be) thing is is that I'm pretty dead-on with subtexts. So I do it all the time too!

Angel Girl said...

LMAO! Well, fine I will shut up :( Going to sulk in corner lol.

Jen said...

Love the way you dissected his email! I do that all time. Subtext tells you more than what is laid out before you.

I agree that other opportunities may present themselves. Either way, enjoy the "big deal" and be sure to give us a full report.

Sarah said...

Angel Girl- You go sulk. With your 9 girlfriends!

Jen- Is it a girl thing? Or do men do this too?

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Sounds as if you need a fuck buddy and David doesn't seem to qualify.

AT said...

Ahh, subtext. I'd be afraid of what you read into the crap I write!
Hope you have a good time tonight, and I hope things work out in your favor.

adventure boy said...

Well he certainly isn't at all interested in you. Leave him alone and find a new target. As Cruise Director you should have a pretty shiny uniform which will attract lots of attention. So I say, grab a good admirer and bonk away. But don't bother David again.

Sarah said...

Sometimes Saintly Nick- You're right. He does not qualify anymore.

AT- With your love of childhood toys? Never!

Adventure Boy- I'm one set ahead of you. I've already deleted all his information. A shiny new uniform? An excuse to go shopping? Yes!!

CoatMan said...

He's a man. Maybe he really is just very tired. Would you want to "get some" if you were as tired as he said he was?

Scorpy said...

LOL...I love it when Americans say 'Rooting for ya' becuase in Australia that means Sex :)
David is Soooo lyting and your eval of his email is spot on.. I should know I have sent and said the same thing when I was avoiding someone.

socal sweetie said...

Lol...I love your subtext. Guys are pretty much lame...hopefully you meet some guy worthy of laying soon! Good luck =P

Sarah said...

Coatman- Yes, I would want to get some any time!

Scorpy- I learned that the hard way after leaving it as a comment on an Aussie's blog. Who knew?

Yeah, looks like I'm turning into a pro at playing the game.

Socal- Yes, I hope I find someone worth laying soon too!

 

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