Spoons

"Big spoon or little spoon?"

Adam's trying to use my terminology.

"Little spoon for movies..."

"And big spoon for sleeping," he finishes. I smile.

He removes the pillows from the couch and we climb on together with me in front, the little spoon. He lays his lower arm under my neck and wraps his free arm around me. Never in my life have I ever felt so good and safe and warm in someone else's arms. I take a moment and ponder if I just feel this way because of the absence of someone else's arms, or if it's Adam. No, even now I still can't answer that.

A couple hours later and we change locations. Instead of feeling good and safe, I feel sexy and skinny and powerful. I truly like kissing Adam. I've learned I'll do just about anything to hear him groan. With Adam, I don't worry that I'm not beautiful enough or smart enough; I don't feel him judging.

He leans forward and sits up in bed and I wrap my legs around him and we make out. Light from the highrise across the street pours in his bedroom window, giving just enough light to see the outline of his slender body. I put my hands on his face and push them through his hair. I want my hands everywhere on him.

A couple hours after that and we settle into sleepy silences. We giggle under his goose down comforter while we slowly make our way into our sleeping positions. Adam turns and thrusts his back towards me. I take the opportunity and snuggle up against him, meeting every crevice of his body with my own, and smoosh my face into his shoulder blade. Adam groans.

"Big spoon?" he asks.

"Big... spoon..." I repeat and fall asleep before I could even finish the thought.