~Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Back at the Batcave

By 10 PM on Saturday we were seated on my couch watching TV.

It should be mentioned that I don't have cable.

It should also be mentioned that I don't like having people in my apartment that I don't know that well.

He took me out to dinner at a microbrewery he frequents with business clients. Afterwards he just drove back to my place without even asking me and followed me in and sat down on my couch.

I opened my fridge and popped a beer top. Maybe drinking myself into a haze would make this night more exciting.

"Would you like one?"

"Do you have anything besides Bud Light?"

"Um, no. I wasn't expecting company."

"Well then Bud Light will be fine."

He found the remote under a pillow and began flipping through the channels. I took a long drink. When he said he was going to plan the night, I thought it meant it was going to be more than dinner at a bar followed by watching TV in my apartment.

"Damn, you have a lot of Spanish stations and religious channels."

"Yeah, er, I only get the 5 major networks. I don't really watch that much TV."

45 minutes later and my beer was getting warm; I didn't even feel like drinking it. I wondered how long I would have to wait before kicking him out of my place-- I wanted to crawl under my down comforter and watch my Grey's Anatomy DVDs in bed.

My phone broke the silence. It was N.

"What are you guys doing?"

"Oh we're watching TV at my place. What's up? Are y'all going out tonight?"

"We're thinking of going to a club."

Desperation hit my voice, "Yes! Let's!"

"Okay, just to warn you, it's a lesbian club."

"I don't care!"

I think N picked up on my desperation to do anything, including spending my Saturday night at a lesbian bar. "Is my friend treating you okay?"

KB leans into my phone, "Don't believe a word Jessica says!"

I looked at him, "Did you just call me Jessica? My name is Sarah."

His eyes widened.

"N, did you just hear him call me Jessica?"


"He's so buying us top shelf tequila for that."

I made a joke out of it, but I was really offended. He was in my home and depleting my beer supply and he forgot my name. Or worse, he was depleting my beer supply and thinking of a girl named Jessica. He should be drinking Jessica's beer.

I got up to change.

"Are you really changing to go to a lesbian club?"

"Why not?"

"Well, they're lesbians. What's the point of dressing up?"

"I'm not going to go to a club in boots and a sweater; I don't care who is there. I like looking nice for me. "

"Is this what I have to look forward to?


"Sitting around while you change?"

I wouldn't be so sure of yourself.

To the lesbian club...


Phil said...

Ooh a bad start to the big date.

Will he recover from calling Sarah by the wrong name?

Will Sarah find love in the arms of another?

And what really occurs in a lesbian bar?

I'm staying tuned.

Anonymous said...

Fuck him! Let the lesbians kick his ass!

Indiana said...

So the date was so bad you switched teams?

Anonymous said...

why not kick his presumptive ass out of your apartment? jeez louise. what. a. flog.

M said...

lol, yeah I've met a couple of men who make me want to "go to the lesbian club" too. ;)

Buttons said...

oh goodness me what a wanker. sorry!

inviting himself in
making himself comfy
calling you the wrong name
and then 'is this what i have to look forward to' as if a) he will have a chance and b) it's not so bad waiting for you to change
and cdefghijk) i thought all guys were FACINATED with lesbians

general_boy said...

He probably thought he was up for a bit of threesome action too! :P

Sarah said...

Phil- POW! WHACK! Too bad I can't make those word bubbles pop up like they did on the TV show :)

TDG- Nah, lesbians would just ignore him. He doesn't have what they want ;)

Indiana- Not quite. You know I like boys too much :)

Anon- God, I really should have. The thought didn't even cross my mind.

M- You know, I always did enjoy dancing with girls more than dancing with boys...

Buttons- SERIOUSLY. And you know what? Only took me 15 minutes to freshen up. Hmph.

General_Boy- LOL! Yeah if I refused to make out with him, then I think the threesome is out!

Walter said...

You had boots on, why didn't you kick him out?

SuvvyGirl said...

If I didn't know any better I would have thought that he was behaving that way so you wouldn't want to go out with him again. But he set up the date. Probably some odd guy test. In the words of Rocky Mountain Princess (as she has told me to do this a time or two) kick his ass to the curb!!

Anonymous said...

"Is this what I have to look forward to?" Wow. What a call!

Sarah said...

Walter- I have no idea. I guess I do want to be nice and not Bitchy McWhoreson.

Suvy- That's a good thought. Unfortunately, that's not the case here.

Nick- It's a little early for jokes like that.


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