~Thursday, December 20, 2007

"Brighter Pastures," and Other Idioms that Describe both Work and Death

This year's annual review went a little better than last year's. For one, I knew I was getting a raise from back during that whole two monitor kick in the face. I'm still the butt of jokes at the office because of that, by the way.

The raise was nice and blah, blah, blah, I'm still going to leave the company. Mainly because of two comments my boss made. Bright lady as she is, she is completely socially inept.

"My ideal employee is one who can read my mind and do the work without me having to tell them to," she said when talking of her expectations. I smiled and waited for the inevitable but. But that's impossible! or But that's just plain crazy talk! or even But you'll do! The but never came and I felt my smile wobble until it was some sort of awkward grimace: lips curled back, teeth exposed. The lady was serious.

"So what are your plans after you work here?"


"I mean, you obviously don't want to do this forever..."

This position? Not so much, but that's what things like promotions are for, right? You know, growing with the company? So I began to ramble about different aspects of the job I enjoyed. Writing company press releases and web design is fun, perhaps you'll create a marketing department and I can head that?

"No, I meant other plans," she clarified. "Like your coworker says she wants to go to grad school. What about you?"

Oh, you mean my job is a complete stepping stone and that there's nowhere for me to go in this company. That the word career apparently doesn't apply to me. And by the looks of this conversation, you don't expect me to be here this time next year, waiting for another raise. You plan instead to get some other chump out of college and pay them monkey wages instead.

I feel you now.


Blue soup said...

sounds familiar... x

Reality said...

"Bright lady as she is, she is completely socially inept."

What your boss secretly added:

Unless she is tanked up with alcohol...drink, drank, DRUNK.

Yes, at least others can see your social skills only improve with beer and copious amounts of wine.

Paige Jennifer said...

So listen, do you work at Dunder Mifflin? Sounds like it...

PS: You're already doing it but I'm going to say it anyway - chin up and let the comments flow. Assholes eventually tire and seek out other people to pick on. And I speak from experience.

Diane Mandy said...

Wow. Sounds she needs to get an education, oh I don't maybe something called MANAGEMENT TRAINING. Sheesh!

kristin b said...

i feel like i maybe need to copy this entry and email it to my boss and ask if we could just fastforward and he could tell me if this is the way he sees it too. part of me thinks that as a boss, as someone who is supposed to manage you and guide you, they should also look out for you and your best interests. atleast that's the kind of boss i'd think to be.. and i've had one like that before, so i know it's not insane.

treacle said...

well I think if she can't see what a valuable person you are then its her luck out. Better things will come your way. Have a fabulous Christmas x

AmyD said...

WTF?!... Your boss sounds completely out of touch with reality AND her employees. Sure does make it easier to leave, though. Congrats on the raise...enjoy it until you find something more worthy of your time.

dont eat the token said...


It's hard to deflect bad feelings at work.


If you don't post before Christmas, I wish you a merry one! And lots of support if you go ahead and talk to your dad about your new flatmate!

Peach said...

clearly she's threatened by you and just trying to make you feel shit, silly cow... many merry christmas cheers to you and your fab blog xxx

general_boy said...

uuugggh. Have you ever thought of going freelance / contract? Really cuts down the b/s ;)

Anyway, thanks for your brutal honesty, often dark humour, and some teriffic reads in 2007.

Wishing you a great Xmas and the very best in 2008. :) xx

Lpeg said...

ugh. What a nasty boss.

Definitely socially inept.

Hope you have a great holiday, and goodluck with letting your dad know about Scott!

Happy Holidays :)

KennethSF said...

In my experience, bosses who expect their subordinates to read their minds are the ones who don't know what they want.

Don't walk--run!

Miss A said...

Ouch. What a bitch though, as clearly she said it to put the idea in your head that you should look to move on.

See - I read her mind, not so impossible after all :-)

Still a bitch though.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes we choose change and sometimes change is thrust upon us. Regardless change is not a bad thing. You will find something better, more appropriate and with more money. Promise.


Ditto Peach's comment. She sounds like she feels threatened by you & she's encouraging you to get out. :(

Anonymous said...

You are kind of in the same position as me, just my boss isn't that bitchy to my face.. she just doesn't back people up when threatened with crazy nurses who could go columbine any second. Here's what I say to myself, and what i'll say to you.. fuck em! You are better than that, and more valuable. If they want to hold on to the shitty workers, and not recognize the great workers then your perfect job/company is still waiting out there for you.


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